Thursday, December 16, 2010

upcoming plans 12/16/10

Well i decided to direct my anger at movies and media. here is a list of things im thinking of reviewing

The imaginarium of doctor parnassus
One flew over the cukoos nest
Clockwork orange
The postman
Gulivers Travels(maybe if Jack Blacks movie isnt too painful)

So if you have any suggestions let me know

Up next The imaginarium of doctor parnassus

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Anger is all i feel

I've been rather angry at the world lately. I lost faith in humanity a long time ago. But i have nowhere to direct all this anger at.I started this blog because i want o get out some of the anger i feel to do that I've given some thought to using this blog to review things that make me angry  so i would like some ideas from you not only what you'd like to see me get angry at but maybe some ways to direct my anger somewhere.

My beliefs

OK so I make reference to my 3 tenets of belief fairly often. What most people don't know is what my beliefs actually are .
I have been through a lot of deep thinking and self exploration.

Not that kind of self exploration
(credit for this pic goes to )

through the years i realized what i believe and came up with 3 things that i believe in

The first thing i believe in is Family.
As anyone who knows me can tell you i have a close extensive family. I also include good friends into my definition of family not just relatives

You have to keep your family They help remind you what your roots are and where you can go. Plus they can always be counted on in a time of need.

The 2nd thing that i believe in is Honor.

This is the hard one to define because I don't live by a code of honor I just try to do the right thing and be the best at what i can.

To live with honor You must work hard and deal fairly in business and do what you think is right AT ALL TIMES.And tell the truth whenever you can

Exceptions must be made ("Does this make me look fat")

The Final Thing I believe in is love.

I believe in romantic true love

its that simple find true love(so far I have failed at this tenet the most).

As far as Religious or Existential beliefs I'm a nihilist so i hold onto these 3 tenets pretty hard or what else is there if you don't have Love family and Honor.

current state of being / sanity/ urge to kill

I found out to day that someone i work with's sister died last week. I do not like this person She is one of several reasons i transferred departments. But here is the thing

I felt no sympathy for her at all. I have lost many loved ones over the past years and  I always feel sad/ sympathy for people when they loose someone even if i don't care for that person.

That was not the case today I realized that i am slipping further and further away into the void of nothingness.

I felt no compassion for the loss of a human life that i can put a name to. that disturbs me because I feel it violates one of the 3 tenets of my belief system(more to come on a later post).  The fact that i am feeling less and less connected to people is not a good thing it paves the way for my asshole nature to do whatever it wants and i have no idea where that will lead.